My Wife Gives Me Migraine!!!!

Hmmmm…. “Marriages are made in heaven”, quite a thought, but I have a sincere request, please please whoever gave this observation, I want to meet him once, to ask him whether he ever got married or not, I feel he never got married …..because the observation is incomplete and misleading, no doubt marriages are made in heaven because no one other than God can match such contrasting pairs no one else can be so intelligent. I mean this match making thing must be fun to God, He must be thinking, “Yes, XYZ is so quiet and speaks so less… dude here you go with ABC, miss talkative in excess, and I will have loads of fun looking at your perfect chemistry.” How I know all this? Pleaseee, I witnessed it myself sir, that too with a migraine dude.
When I got engaged I thought how true it is, my fiancé looked so sweet, so innocent such a simple girl. Mine was an arrange marriage. My romance started with our engagement and SPARKS flew as soon as we got married, and mind it when I say spark I actually mean to say Flames Soaring High Flames.7
Ok, so my mom saw her at a marriage and I don’t know whose marriage it was but it opened doors of heaven for me… a heaven which was a mirage… I mean c’mon I guess the long list of relatives and friends is for parents’ convenience to check out every boy or girl for their kids, no matter if their kids want it or not. Her name is Manasvi, what a sweet name. Anyways, my mom saw her, liked her, talked to her aunt and got the basic info about her. In fact my mom silently came up to me and stealthily asked me to look at the third girl from the right on the stage, obviously enough it was Manasvi. I looked at her and no doubt she was beautiful, she had something that was so good, I can’t deny this, and I really liked her. She looked cute in pink and her cheeks matched the color of her sari and I loved it. And so the procedures began, my parents talked to her parents, I went to her home, and both of us agreed and soon got engaged. I used to call her initially during the day and later as our puppy love developed we started talking late nights. All this was so beautiful “nothing better than falling in love”, I used to say this to myself. Sometimes I used to fall asleep in between our late night conversations, when it happened for the first time I thought she would get annoyed but madam Manasvi lovingly said to be, “You snore baby, and I did not disconnect the call as your snoring made me feel close to you, it was so cute.” “Such an angel”, I said to myself, she does not even have any problem with my snoring, in fact she loves it, and I thought I am oh so lucky. There were many other things that made me feel so lucky to find her. But yr misconception kahan nahi hai… even I had one. After our lovey dovey romance, we got married, went for our honeymoon, that was fun, we went to a hill station and she fell ill, most of the time I was looking after her. But no regrets because still we got some precious moments together.
Now began the realization phase, and please don’t take it as if I don’t love her but things change… I slept carelessly without bothering about my snoring thing… why? Simple, my wife found my snoring CUTE… hmmmm… feeling jealous but don’t worry here comes the cyclone. One night my sweet sweet wife woke me up in anguish, as soon as I opened my eyes I could see she was getting furious, madam Manasvi yelled at me then ,”Will you let me sleep now?” “Hello!, what did I do, Babe?” I had no clue why she shouted like that but soon I got a reply, she shouted again,” Your snoring irritates me, Will you please control it?” “But, you found it cute?” was all I could say and she was more than amazed, “you took so seriously, I said it romantically, tomorrow get something for this snoring thing, if you keep snoring like this I will never be able to sleep, good night.” I had nothing to say, yes I took it seriously, and yes I loved you more when you said that, “now sleep, and try not to snore,” she said again. What to say, I followed madam’s order and slept or I was just lying on the bed wondering what actually happened. That was the first night when I got a headache and brother trust me heartache too.
Once before we got married, she said to me, “It’s so easy to make me happy baby, whenever I get upset just take me for shopping.” I thought “simple, so easy to please my dear darling.” PROVED WRONG AGAIN…. When after marriage we went for shopping for the first time, I knew it what I have to face all through my life, six long hours, trust me six long hours to select what …a pair of bathroom slippers, she wanted a cute one, suddenly I had started hating this word “cute”. I could have watched a perfect cricket match but no my sweetheart wanted CUTE BATHROOM SLIPPERS, save me please, My Wife Gives Me Migraine.
It was not just her love for shopping but a lot more that was earlier cute to me, but now it turned out to be devilish for me. Let’s compare before and after marriage…. Before marriage she was my sweet little miss talkative in excess, she looks so “cute” while talking, the way she winks at me while talking, I thought she completes me since I am not that talkative so we will always have something to talk, this time I am not wrong, we still have a lot to talk… ok let me edit it I still have a lot to Hear… I mean yr she talks so much about everyone and everything… I mean I am all ears to whatever is relevant to us but how to tell her, “darling please I am not interested in knowing what miss GHI wore at the kitty and why everyone laughed at her back, baby please don’t tell me which neighbor of ours is having an affair with whose wife, I love you and let’s talk about us.” But no… my miss talkative in excess gets over my nerves with all the irritating issues, how would I know which blouse matches with which hairclip?
Once we went to a party, very normally I complemented one of my female colleagues, “Hey you look good in black.” That time my wife smiled sweetly and supported my complement saying, “Yes, black really suits you.” Saying so she looked at me and smiled again but since I know her so well, I knew it that I have created a serious problem for myself. I knew it well, very well that tonight I am gone. Once madam Manasvi said to me, “Baby jealousy is far from me, I love you a lot and I am more than confident about your love for me, so no matter you complement who or anything else, I trust you.” See how lucky I am. Wrong man, again I am wrong, I was proved wrong by her that night, and she asked, “Ok so you think she looks good in black.” “Arey yr, it was just a casual remark.” I clarified myself. “Fine, I am not even asking anything, it’s your opinion.” She said in a cold voice. I had no intention to stretch the issue, in fact I was quite ok that she herself is not saying much, relieved, and thinking that the issue ended there only, I was laughing that I got such an easy escape from my devil. But no proved wrong again, why she scores over me all the time. She suddenly said, “Whenever I ask you which nail color matches with my sari, all you say is darling I get confused with colors, then…..”…………………..long pause, a silent one I was actually scared to ask then what….. I was now sure that there is no escape for me now, this time I have to face it… no matter how much I hate argument, you know that time how I actually felt, I felt as if I was lying on the floor on my stomach and she was holding my feet, pulling me towards herself and I was trying to escape with all my might. But oh no the devil got me, nhiiiii she got hold of me.
Now when she has got me and I have to answer her I feel like a dumb student who knows no answer and she is my teacher, I said, “I just complemented her normally, and you must not bother me with such small an issue.” Oh! Did I say this, not bad I am so brave, and she was taken aback. Yes yes yes I won… I was happy, but again I lost, how? Madam Manasvi started crying. Not done, you can’t win every time. It took approximately two hours to pacify her and then she slept, and what about me? Nothing got a severe headache and now I had actually started understanding the facts, the harsh and hidden facts about marriage. Well what to say, I have only one thing to pray to God, help me out, My Wife Gives Me Migraine.
But we love each other and there is no doubt about it and these are some moments that add spice to our life, it’s just it gets too spicy sometimes. After all she is a woman, not an easy task to understand her. See she loves me but things are rather complex. Of course she is no devil but a little devilish.
Once before we got married she asked, “Do you drink?”, I thought and then gave her an intelligent reply, “ I drink occasionally, whenever I go out with my friends.” She did not ask me how many times I go out with my friends and so I did not tell her. She said, “Occasionally drinking is okay.” Hmmmm… I was happy, but soon after we got married she started having problems with my friends too, “why does he joke so much? And why that friend of yours keeps talking about his gadgets? Why do they keep calling you on weekends? Is it so that you don’t want to spend time with me? Is it so that you like them more?” and a long list of questions to answer. I hope now you know why I call her madam. Have I ever thought of taking revenge, no not exactly, I mean I enjoy pulling her leg sometimes but not always.
I love the chemistry we share with all the sugar and spice in it. A little more fun, in fact a lot more fun because I am sure we are going to get old together, I am going to love my madam Manasvi forever.

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