My mother lost her sister to Cancer when I was two. I often saw my mother talk about her, how beautiful she was, how innocent and loving she was and how much she loved my mother and us, and how she would have loved and pampered us if she were there. Then my mother made a best friend, a lady who lived next door. They were besties, as I was a little girl, all I knew was that they were friends, now as a woman, I understand, she was not just my mother’s best friend, she was like her sister. They were best friends and they shared everything. Then the lady moved to a different place, my mother was lonely again…she had no one to be with…
Some would say how was she lonely again, she had her family, a husband, three kids, her parents, her brothers. How can a woman with so many people around her be lonely? My answer: She was lonely for she had no sister. A sister can be any woman around us, our sisters, mothers, mom in laws, sister in laws, daughters, daughter in laws, our girlfriends.
Yes, I feel, even when my mother and my dadi were not very close still, I can remember times when I have seen only both of them being there for each other. I have seen them fighting, I have seen them not at all agreeing to each other and then I have seen that whenever my mother fell ill, my father, may be took her to the doctor, and then left for office, now we women, need more than medicine to feel better; my dadi would make tea for my mother, she would even gently put her hand on my mother’s head, pat her back, scold her to have food even when she said she did not feel like eating. My mother had a sister – my dadi. No matter how much they said they did not agree, only they were there to understand each other.
My dadi is above 95 now. There have been times when she had been sick, very sick, she would refuse to lie down on bed, refuse to even identify us even her son – my father but only remembered my mother’s name, only trusted my mother and only listened to her. My mother is her sister and they understand each other.
Why they, even after not being fond of each other, clearly stating that they don’t like each other – stand up for each other time and again? Why? Because they are women… because they are mothers and because only they knew what the other one might have felt at times – At times when my father – my dadi’s son was not able to understand his own mother, at times – when we kids did not understand our own mother, those two women even after fighting stood there for each other.
And that’s why I say keep your sisters closer- All of them – sisters, daughters, MILs, DIL, girlfriends and all women related to you. For when time passes love waxes, children grow up and move on, careers take a back seat, jobs come and go, men don’t do what they are supposed but sisters stay forever, no matter how far they are, no matter how long it has been since you have talked to each other. They will always come out in your support, and as you would walk the long road of life trying to make yourself learn to give importance to yourself, your sisters would stand there on the other edge of the road to cheer for you, they might even break the rules and come back to walk with you and never let you go off your true self.
We women, we need our sisters, they are the cheerleaders who cheer for us even when we fall down, they cheer for us to get up and get going. Make more friends, become your own friend and give yourself what you truly deserve – love of your sisters.
One more example that I want to share is my own, as I became a mother, because of hormones, because of changed roles, I did feel lonely, I did feel left out somewhere, I did feel I was loosing myself (Please do not equate to me being unhappy becoming a mother, I am happy, I am the happiest to have my little girl, for in her I found a new sister 🙂 )
When I felt lost my sisters helped me find myself, my best friend, Thanuja, who had my back when I thought of being alone, my sister, Pooja, who made me laugh and who pampered me, Veena aunty, for she gave shape to my writing when I tumbled down with words 😛 my girlfriends whom I haven’t met but their unconditional support helped me realise my love to write – Meigha, she is my senior, and I could never ask for a better one, she is a sister to me for all the support I have got as I struggled to get back to my true writer self after having a baby; Shavet, Namrata, Akshata, Shipra, Prachi, Parul, Shokhi, Kanika and the entire mycity4kids team – we are sisters who keep on encouraging me no matter how bad I write sometimes; my daughter who puts a smile on my face always; and all my sisters and girlfriends with whom I have failed to stay in touch much but I value them and I love them. This is dedicated to all you guys.
In the end I would say this again – Keep your sisters closer – You Will Need Them! Go out with them, share good times, bad times okay times :)This is a what I am going to teach my daughter as well when she grows up.
P.S. : Writing this blog was inspired after I watched a video shared on wats app by my best friend. That video made me realise the value of my sisters ❤