Motherhood is bliss. Yes, we moms go all crazy with the baby, the love, the sparsh (touch) of the baby is incomparable to any joy in this world. But is everything people say about motherhood is true? IS it true that every mother just falls in love with the baby at first sight? Is it true that every mother goes through similar emotions?
I would really like to discuss some misconceptions that people have regarding motherhood
- A mother naturally gets to know everything and knows what’s best for the baby.
Is it? No, moms make mistakes. We are human and we are no experts, we have never taken care of a baby and so we learn with time. There will be bumps on heads, rashes on poo poo and slips and falls and then we will learn. I personally feel a mom grows up with her baby. My baby is three years old and I am a three year old mom. That’s the only experience I have, I do not have 29 years of experience of motherhood.
- It is always love at first sight.
No dear, how can it be love at first sight for every new mom! Every mom is different and the feeling of becoming a mom is different as well. Some of us feel overwhelmed with responsibilities and the seriousness of it; some are slightly better at handling it and do fall in love the very first time and manage things well; some get scared or worried thinking what if they made a mistake. The only thing that is true and common to all moms is CONCERN, concern for the baby.
- All moms have the same feeling about the status of being a mom.
Moms know their priorities, they take maternity leave, sabbatical or sometimes give up the job altogether. Knowing that we might not be able to go out for a movie for at least two years, or you know hang out with friends and just sleep whenever we want – all these things are gone. Even if our body will be in a different place, our mind will only be there with the baby, worrying about numerous things. And trust me it’s not that we deliberately try and worry, it’s just that this worry refuses to leave us.
- A mom is the epitome of sacrifice.
I don’t know about other moms but anyone who says this to me thinking that he/she is giving me a complement; I just want to say things to that person that I shouldn’t. If we do give up things for our baby then it is just because we know that that’s what is needed and we know how to prioritize. In case we do make a sacrifice, sometimes we are happy about it, sometimes we are not that happy but that is the only option we have. Don’t put the burden of being a selfless soul on us. We moms do think about ourselves. I still keep an extra piece of cake for myself; I hide it and eat later.(Although it is an entirely different thing that my daughter finds me every time, everywhere and eats the most of it.) But moms prioritize and do not always just keep on sacrificing for no good reason, we are wise, wise moms and we know how to find a mid-way.
- Moms like their kids all the time
Duh! No. When my toddler wants her nose goop back and cries for an hour howling, ‘Meri nosey waapas karo’ I do not like her. I do not like her when she purposely does the things I ask her not to do. There are times when we do not like our kids and it is good for them. We love them all the time but there are times when we do not like what they do and so do not like them.
- Mothers think their kids are beautiful always.
See now we love our babies and we find no fault in their looks. But know, we know what their best features are. When we say all babies are beautiful, it is all of us are beautiful people. I mean, honestly, we are not blind.
- There is a right way to motherhood.
Oh! Is it? NO. My friend did not give any sugar to her baby until she turned two. I used to give almost everything to my baby by the time she was six months old and that included a little ice cream and crushed candies as well. My daughter is as healthy and active as my friend’s daughter. Some moms let the baby cry it out, some scold, some pamper and nothing is wrong. It is only about being the best for the baby in different situations. For my daughter a hug works better to calm her down most of the times but sometimes a stern voice is needed and sometimes crying it out is the best option.
- Moms can do it all perfectly.
Moms HAVE to do it all. Sometimes we do it perfectly and sometimes there are blunders – big or small. Run errands, manage maids, keep the baby happy and healthy, wash, poop cleaning, cooking, sending out cards to relatives we try to do it all but don’t unnecessarily put the expectation of everything being perfect.
If you know more such misconceptions, feel free to share them in comments section so that the article could become even more interesting and informative.